In what order did these events occur? Dan Koch disappeared. Then we
had this "bizarre," wave of peculiarities. Could it be the
administration (or as we so affectionately refer to it as: Big Brother)?
Why hasn't anyone investigated the disappearance of Dan?
I happen to have seen Dan on occasion SINCE his disappearance. He was
here "selling Amway" and coercing others to "sell Amway" as well.
Why is Dan selling Amway when he had a perfectly good job offer from
Quad Graphics? Why is Dan "selling Amway?" I'll tell you why Dan is
"selling Amway." Dan is "selling" and "recruiting for Amway" because
it is gang-speak for "I have to find someone else for my kidnappers to
kidnap since my disappearance is drawing absolutely no attention."
Why was Dan's disappearance drawing absolutely no attention? Because
the first time someone began asking questions, we lost a professor.
Hmmm. That kept people side tracked for an entire semester. When
things calmed down, Big Brother had to think of something else.
Isn't it strange that the WLC plague reached farther than the
cafeteria? The secretary pool, high schools in West Allis, the
student body, even Judy's daughter! Have they no decency?
Although lower than in past years, they knew that the 4.5% increase
would adversely affect the student body. At least they were not
targeting uninvolved parties.
New buildings, more parking tickets, less teachers, network crashes,
weird class schedules…it is all to draw our attention away from the
real problem at hand: Where is Dan Koch and why is he still trying
to sell Amway?